5 Indoor Activities to do With Your Children

August 13, 2013 By: Bril

“Rain, rain go away, little Johny wants to play.” Rainy season tends to make children grumpy and cranky. So here are a few ideas on how to make staying indoors fun for them. It is a great way to bond with your children as well.

Have a movie marathon

Grab a tub of popcorn, dim the lights, create a theatre ambience and have your movies ready. Choose from classic children movies including educational ones and have a marathon! It is a great way to spend time with them and they won’t even mind staying indoors.

Don’t make it a habit to let them watch the TV for so long at a stretch though.

Get baking

Children love sweet-nothings. Cakes, cookies etc. are a great hit with them. Now, get them to the kitchen and use their help in whipping up some baked goodies. Let them do simple things like assembling the ingredients, mixing the batter, pouring it in pans and decorating the cakes with icing, sprinkles, chocolate chips etc. Keep them away from the oven though. Not only is it fun, but it will also help them use their imagination and give them a sense of accomplishment.

Have a dance party

Kids have a lot of energy. Staying indoors and doing nothing can mean chaos for you. And if you have more than one child, then you know a ‘war’ is about to start! Channel their energy into something more fun and constructive and have a dance party instead. This way you won’t be prying them off each other or cleaning away the remains of a broken vase.

Find some age appropriate songs and get dancing with your children!

Make a scrapbook

Bring out all your old photos and make a scrapbook out of them with your children. Get colourful papers, glitter, ribbons, stickers, crayons or poster colours etc. and let your child discover his/her inner artist. Making a scrapbook is time-consuming, yet fun. This is hard work your kids won’t mind doing!

Scrapbooks are great way of reviving good old memories while making new ones!

Play board games

Nowadays, indoor games mean PS3 and Xbox for children. Steer them away from these violent and addictive games and re-introduce old fashioned board games. Get the whole family together and play games like UNO, Monopoly, Scotland Yard, Bingo etc. Not only is it a lot of fun, but some games which involve trivia are also quite educational.

Shake your kids out of gloomy boredom and make indoors fun for them!

Why Having Choices Should be a Choice for Children

July 30, 2013 By: Bril

Broccoli or beans? Snow White or Bambi? Dance class or art class? Let your child decide. Giving children the freedom to make small choices today is probably the best way to prepare them for the world tomorrow.

In our society, this is a phenomenon that is rarely exercised. As children, we were told by our parents what to do and what not to do. They in turn followed their parents’ instructions. But times have changed! And with the changing times our parenting techniques should change as well.

We want our children to grow up to be responsible adults who make smart choices in life. We want them to know the difference between right and wrong. But, if they have always been dependent on us to make any choices in life, then how can we suddenly expect them to become independent?

External influences are plenty. The pressure of smoking, drinking, doing drugs and bunking classes all come with teen life. Without being groomed to make the right choices, when the time comes to make unsupervised decisions, children usually give in to peer pressure or end up making the wrong choices.

Did you know you can actually even avoid the angry outbursts of the ‘terror teen’ years…just by encouraging your children to learn smart decision taking early on in life! For example, let your toddler pour his/her own glass of juice. Don’t reprimand him/her for spilling the juice if they do. Gently suggest that maybe next time they could figure out a better way of doing the same task or ask for your help. Either ways a choice exists and knowing that he/she has a say makes a world of difference!

When you give your child choices, it is not a carte blanche to let your children do as they please. As a parent you should monitor those choices for them. This way, with your guidance, they will learn what is right or wrong for themselves.

You will soon see, that encouraging your children to decide for themselves, instills confidence and a sense of responsibility in children which stays with them forever. Let them make mistakes early on – let them make the wrong choices. When they make the choice they have to take the onus of the consequences as well. As adults they will be equipped enough to make the right choices tomorrow when it comes to important issues.

Children should know that when it comes to certain issues they have no choice. For example, ‘Don’t play with fire’, ‘Don’t talk to strangers’, ‘Eat your veggies’ or ‘Bed time is 8:00pm’ are things that children don’t have a say in. As a parent you definitely know better! Letting them choose what pyjamas they want to wear to bed when they stick to their bed time is permissible.

Having choices means having control – turn your frustrated or angry child to someone responsible and motivated. Tomorrow, when they are away from you, they won’t feel helpless and at a loss not knowing what decision to take or what choices to make.

Tips for Travelling with Your Baby

July 23, 2013 By: Bril

The thought of travelling with your baby can bring nightmares to you. Your baby may be the apple of your eye, but let’s face it he/she is definitely a handful. That too at home! No wonder then travelling with your baby seems like an intimidating task!

So, to ease your worries we have some really effective tips for travelling with your baby. Trips and getaways need not be a thing of the past. By overcoming some of hiccups and with strategic planning your travelling days can be back!

So, the first thing you need to remember while travelling with your baby is to make sure you pack all the required items. This includes basic items like baby clothes, few toys, milk bottles, pacifiers etc.

A travel crib, portable baby chair and stroller are also good choices to take along!

When it comes to food, carry your baby’s formula in an air-tight bag or their favourite cereal and porridge. Even though you might get it in stores, there are chances you might get stuck in some place where there are no stores nearby!

Besides food and other essentials, pack necessary medicines for flu, stomach bug, fever and other common illnesses.

This holds good especially during road trips.

While travelling with your baby via car, make sure you pack enough snacks for them. Take frequent rest stops and get out of the car. This way you can take enough breaks to feed your baby and give them a rest from sitting in the car. This will help your baby not get cranky!

Now when you are travelling with your baby in a plane, make sure you feed them during take-offs and landings – this helps ease the ear-pressure off.

Flights can get real chilly sometimes, so dress your baby with in layers. Carry extra clothes (warm ones) with you, just in case.

One of the most helpful tips while travelling with your baby via plane is to book an extra seat. You can bring your car seat along and strap in your baby safely and conveniently.

If your baby gets cranky, hold him and walk on the aisle, feed him (window seat is preferable here) and play with him. Don’t worry other passengers are not glaring at you! They probably understand and some of them might actually offer to babysit!

If you are travelling with your baby to your parents’ house or a friend’s house, then you can have the whole house at your disposal – creating a home here away from your home will be easy!

But, if you are staying at a hotel, try to get a bigger room – where you can have a changing station and a feeding station for your baby. A play space will be a bonus!

The best way you can enjoy your vacation while travelling with your baby is by giving your partner breaks. Take turns to take care of the baby and let the other person enjoy some ‘me-time’ to relax or explore.

So travelling with your baby will not be a problem anymore. In fact it can be the most memorable experience of your life and you find so many ways to bond with your baby on a trip!

It’s Story Time!

July 9, 2013 By: Bril

“There is no agony like bearing an untold story inside of you.” —Maya Angelou

Story-telling session. Image courtesy: Vinitha Ramchandani

One of the latest researches being driven in many organizations today is related to developing story-telling capability in leaders to enhance their effectiveness. Being able to tell a story is an art and also a skill, which, often, is a key success ingredient for people in many professions. If you follow a story telling ritual at home, the good news is that your child may already have a head-start in this area.

Many parents make stories a bedtime ritual with their children while some designate some time during the day. Some parents get the child to choose their favorite story and it might mean repeating the same story for many days till the child chooses another one. Some parents look for a new story to tell. Some rely on just audio story telling while some engage the child in visuals as well.

Stories are a great tool for facilitating the development of a child. Stories are not only able to get a child to listen and comprehend but also encourage thinking. Children are able to memorize key aspects of the story and ask questions.

Some simple steps that parents and child caregivers can take to make story telling a joyful event and to maximize the learning for a child are:

a) Get access to a story repository. Sign up for a conventional library, which can provide children’s books or get access to online stories (in text format). While you can make a child listen to pre-recorded audios, listening to a story in your voice is likely to be much better appreciated by the child. Don’t shy away from making up your own story some times too. It is a great way for you to get your message through.

b) Designate a specific time during the day as ‘Story Time’. This is uninterrupted time with no eating, no phone calls, no television or other interruptions.

c) Allow the child to have a say in which story / kind of story he / she would like to listen to. Everyone loves choices. Children do too.

d) Talk slowly and clearly. Children need to follow the words, need time for comprehension and to visualize.

e) Encourage imagination. Paint the scene by using more words than might be written. Point to the pictures to enable visualization. Use facial expressions to bring out emotions.

f) Make it participative. Do not hush the child when he / she laughs about something or asks a question. Encourage observation and curiosity. Ask questions about new words or what just happened. It is important to ensure that the child was able to comprehend the story and it is interesting to note what the child registered from the story.

g) Have fun. Story time is not a serious time. While the message might be serious from your perspective, making it a fun experience for the child will drive the message home much faster.

Story telling is a wonderful way to get a child to pick up a language. One of the experiments we have recently started at home is to get my daughter to tell us a story every day, at bedtime. I am amazed by her imagination and how she is able to string together various events during the day, bring out aspects she wants to communicate in the form of a story. It is a great way to also encourage her to develop fluency in English too.

It’s Story Time!

Re-published with permission from the blog of ParentEdge, a bi-monthly parenting magazine that aims to expose parents to global trends in learning and partner with them in the intellectual enrichment of their children.

Getting my child to do what I want him to do

June 21, 2013 By: Bril

I had always believed in getting my older child to do what I want her to do (eat vegetables, go to bed early) by reasoning with her. Of course, as she grew older, the ‘reasoning’ became arguing and sometimes even yelling. When I felt ashamed that I had raised my voice and called names, I would tell myself that she had pushed me to the limit. After all, I had still communicated why she needed to do certain things.

With my younger son, however, I find that coaxing does not work. Neither does yelling. So I have to resort to some imaginative storytelling, some exaggeration (white lies?).

I used to find this distasteful earlier; I used to believe (rather naively) that if children are told why something is good for them, they will eventually come around to doing it.

I now realize that given constraints of time and mommy energy, I have to resort to methods that I earlier looked down upon as ‘underhand’.

Let me give you an example – my son needs a hair cut every three weeks (yes!) which he detests. I tried explaining the reason (he gets a bad cold otherwise). I tried saying firmly that he has to get a haircut, no choice. But he refused to budge. And it is not practical to transport a kicking, screaming four year old boy.
Then came the saving grace – a policeman! Yes, there was a neighbour who dropped by, in full uniform. And since my son wants to grow up to be a policeman, I pointed out the really short hair…and lo behold, my son was ready for a hair cut!

Now, when my son gets too rough with his sister or friends, or when he refuses to eat vegetables, I say, “A policeman is rough only with thugs.” or “How will you chase thieves if you dont eat veggies and become strong?”

While these methods are highly effective for my son (and are a blessing in disguise for my vocal chords), I still have not reconciled fully to this approach.

Should I not get my child to do what I want him to do, simply because it is the ‘right’ thing to do?

Clear Expectations Make Discipline Easier

June 10, 2013 By: Bril

Sometimes it can be very challenging to communicate anything with your child. Setting clear expectations regarding what’s acceptable behavior and what isn’t imperative to successfully teaching your child right from wrong. If the parameters are muddled or the child learns that in one situation the rules hold true yet in another situation the same rule does not, it makes for confusion and frustration on both sides.

Sit down with your child well in advance and line out the expectations and consequences of misbehaving or a misdeed. Make it clear that in no uncertain terms is there any room for negotiation at the time of the infraction, and that should such a behavior occur you intend to be firm in your discipline. Rules regarding your child’s safety, health or well-being should have no room for negotiation when being set or enforced. Other rules can be openly and honestly discussed with your child and an agreed upon action should be forged that both parents and child can agree upon. If necessary, make a contract between parent and child. Lay it all out in black and white, in language your child can clearly understand. For younger children, you might want to develop a good behavior chart within the contract, and for each week that goes by without any infractions being noted, a favorite or special activity might be earned. The connection between good deeds and special time with mom and/or dad might be just the currency they understand.

But all children need to understand that disciplining them is your way of teaching them what’s acceptable behavior and what isn’t. It may seem as though children fight rules and regulations, but they truly know that such parameters are meant for their well-being, health, safety, and enable them to grow into a mature person capable of making wise decisions.

Connect with Your Child but Don’t Overdo it

June 7, 2013 By: Bril

We all want to connect and be involved with our child. Children of involved parents generally feel more confident, assured and have a higher level of self esteem. They excel in school and do well in extracurricular activities and with their hobbies. But is there such a thing as too much involvement? It’s imperative when you’re becoming involved with your school-aged child’s activities and academics that you recognize the line of what being too involved can be.

Remember, you’re becoming involved in your child’s life. It’s important that you don’t intrude too much upon it. Children need their space and privacy and they need to be able to develop their own skills, talents and abilities. In our eagerness to help our child succeed, it’s tempting to want to step in and start doing things for them because you feel they are doing it incorrectly or inadequately. But remember, you had to learn too, and this is their chance to learn on their own.

Be there to encourage and support your child, and offer praise at a job well done. But also remember to step back and allow your child to learn from their own mistakes, and to develop their own way of doing things. We all know from our own life experiences that there’s always more than just one way to do something, and just because your child is doing it differently than you would doesn’t make it wrong. Who knows, it could present a terrific opportunity for you to learn from your child as well.

In addition, try not to become too overbearing or nosy when it comes to their social life. Be available for them should they need to talk and encourage them to share their troubles with you so you can help them sort through a problem. But if they say they don’t want to talk about it or they just need some time to figure things out for themselves, respect that need by letting them know you’re available whenever they need you. This is an important part of growing up and allowing a child to figure his own way through things is an integral part of that process.

Successful Two-Way Communication with your Child

June 4, 2013 By: Bril

One of the most frustrating challenges we face as parents is communicating effectively with our child. Though we strive to open an honest two-way line of communication with our child, we become frustrated when it appears their attention isn’t solely on us or the conversation at hand. Yet we seem to find it’s perfectly acceptable to discuss things with them while reading the paper, folding clothes, or working on the computer and then are often left wondering when the lines of communication broke.

Children are by nature easily distracted and not always responsive to their environment. It is the responsibility of the parent to emphasize positive patterns of communication and ensure the child learns that ignoring communication is not acceptable. Early prevention, in the form of educating your child about the proper forms of communication, is the key to ensuring that the non-verbal agreement does not take hold. Teach your child by example. Remain completely and totally focused on them and the conversation at hand. Turn off the television; allow calls to go to the voicemail, or go in a room where there are no distractions.

Talk to your child, and explain to them in age-appropriate terms how they are communicating and why their method doesn’t work. Show your child how to communicate effectively, even when the questions are hard. Make yourself an active listener. Let them voice their opinion or side of the story and ask questions to ensure you understand their viewpoint.

Be constant in the manner in which you communicate with your child. Send the same message with each and every interaction. Allow your child to see that you will call their attention to those times that the unwanted behavior rears its ugly head.Kids will be kids and they will sometimes be distractive and non-communicative. You are the expert in knowing your child’s behavior and can best judge the improvement in their communications. The best way to ensure healthy communication patterns is to model positive communication skills.

Social Concerns of Homeschooling

May 31, 2013 By: Bril

Social skills is an area of deep concern when it comes to homeschooling. Many critics point out that since man needs to hone his social skills, a homeschooling environment where social interaction is limited is detrimental to his growth and development. But studies have proved this wrong.Children put into the fiercely competitive school environments lack the confidence to hold a conversation. Such children show little genuine interest in the topic of conversation and don’t know how to interact with people of various age groups, especially their elders.

Children who learn at home are more aware of the implications and the purpose of their learning. They will ask intelligent questions and make accurate observations. Children begin their life by imitating their parents. Homeschooled children therefore pickup the sterling qualities they see in their parents. On the other hand, they are protected from the detrimental influences of their peers.

These children are thus better equipped with the tools necessary to face the world. The positive reinforcement that takes place in the homeschooling environment as opposed to being abandoned,
embarrassed or ignored in a normal school environment strengthens their self-esteem. Children turn out to be better balanced andwell-rounded as they progress into adulthood.

Training the Fussy Eater

May 28, 2013 By: Bril

Toddlers can be fussy eaters who refuse to try new food atleast half of the time. Approximately half of all toddlers fit this description, so it is no wonder that food issues are a source of stress for parents.Establishing a healthy eating pattern is important to avoid problems such as obesity and eating disorders later in life. Various strategies can help your child accept a wider range of foods. It may be necessary to offer a food to your child as many as ten different times before they choose to eat it. The problem is, many parents get frustrated and give up before the fourth or fifth try.

Try to make foods fun. Colorful foods like carrot sticks, raisins, apples, grapes, cheese sticks and crackers can all be fun and healthy choices for your growing toddler. Explain to them that eating good food is important so they’ll grow big and strong, and how it will help them run faster and play longer.

Children learn behaviors from their parents. If you restrict yourself to a narrow range of foods, your child will take notice and mimic your caution. Don’t limit your child’s food variety to only those foods you prefer. It may be that your child’s tastes are different to yours, and perhaps you are simply serving them foods they don’t happen to like. Try to set a good example and try a variety of foods in front of your child. It could motivate them to do the same.

If your child seems healthy and energetic, then they are eating enough. If you are still concerned, keep an eye on how much food they actually eat over the day. Children tend to graze constantly, rather than restrict their eating to three meals per day like adults. You may be surprised how those little handfuls and snacks add up. For further reassurance, check your child’s growth and weight charts, or check with your child’s paediatrician.Try not to worry, and remember, that unless a child is ill, they will eat. Children are very good at judging their hunger and fullness signals. Try to stay relaxed about mealtime and offer your child a wide variety of foods, and most importantly, remember to set a good example by trying a wide variety of foods yourself. You may discover you and your toddler share a new found favorite food!